The Empire

I would never…and I mean never…park in a handicapped parking spot. I’m not even sure I’m okay with all handicapped people parking in handicapped spot. I think there should be different levels of handicapped placards. if you became handicapped doing something incredibly stupid that had over a 50% chance of making you handicapped you have to park a little farther away and are not entitled to grade A premium parking space. We can sort out the details when I’m in congress. Now, again, I do not and would not park in a handicapped parking space but I love the handicapped stall at work…or in any public restroom. When I get to the men’s room and see it vacant I get a feeling of triumph! A feeling that things are really coing my way for the day. I’ll usually get comfortable and then send texts to friends to let them know about my good fortune. There’s a lot of leg-room and the rails on the wall give me a feeling of security. I’ve been lucky thus far…thus far I’ve not had a person in a wheelchair come in while I have been basking in my “big stall” glory. I’m not sure how I’d handle it…and apology while not making eye contact… perhaps a pronounced fake limp on the way out. I am not sure why I feel no remorse when using the Big Stall yet feel guilt about even considering the handicapped parking when i have to just run into the store for a second. Maybe it’s because “men’s room” time is the only part of my day I really look forward to and the benefits of the big stall far outweigh the negatives.